Benefits of Life Coaching
Your thoughts are the true
creative force in your life. Keep
them positive, thankful,
What do you most want to achieve? What is stopping you? What is keeping you stuck?
You have a choice about how to live your life. If it is not exactly what you want, you can either continue with the way things are and hope it somehow magically gets better, or you can choose to do something about it. Working with a life coach will help you to change old destructive habits, unlearn behaviours that no longer serve you, and transform unhelpful, limiting thoughts and beliefs into ones that support you and your growth. A life coach will help you to recognise that you are infinitely resourceful, will show you how to become aware of your inner strength, learn how to draw on it effectively, and see the possibilities it offers you. When you are feeling stuck, it is because you are focussing on the wrong things and this is disempowering you.
Life coaching is effective for helping you to:
Do any of these ring true for you?
You want a more balanced and fulfilling life where you feel in control.
You want support in growing and developing your potential.
You feel dissatisfied but need help in identifying the problem and how to resolve it.
You want to achieve more with less effort and stress.
You want more out of life/work but are not sure quite how to get it.
You want support in overcoming specific challenges in your personal or professional life.
You are facing major change and would like help in working through it successfully.
You would like support in learning to handle stress and control your moods and behaviour.
You would like to change unwanted habits or beliefs and increase your self esteem.
You feel stuck and are looking for encouragement in kick-starting your motivation.
You want to communicate better and improve your relationships either at work or at home.
"You will become as great as your
Life coaching focuses your attention on what is actually going on for you and what needs to change.
Life coaching helps you to see things clearly and find workable solutions for challenges.
Life coaching enables you to identify your priorities and set realistic and achievable goals.
Life coaching keeps you focused and holds you accountable for your decisions and choices.
The life coach works with you regularly to keep you motivated, inspired and energised.
The life coach gives you the support and encouragement you need to keep you moving forwards.
The life coach's objectivity allows her to point tendencies out to you that you are not aware of yourself.
"All people live in their own
dream, in their own mind;
of the major areas that life coaching helps you to
become even more aware of is your self talk.
Self–talk refers to the dialogue that goes on inside
your head when faced with conflict or life
challenges or even simple day-to-day concerns. This
aspect of yourself has a running commentary about
everything you do. It never lets anything go by with
out some comment, remark or evaluation. Self-talk
can be positive or negative. More
often than not, it is negative, causing unnecessary
stress and making life a misery.
Becoming aware of
this process is the first step in taking charge of
this self-sabotaging part of yourself. The automatic
reactions you have to this constant barrage of
negative thoughts, judgments and evaluations can
keep you feeling stressed and less able to meet
It can also compromise your immune system,
leading to a host of minor symptoms and ultimately,
if left unchecked, to serious health problems of one
sort or another.
You’ll recognize these thoughts because you have heard them all your life; “I'm not smart enough, something is wrong, I can't do it, I never finish anything, this is too hard, change takes too long, etc”. You may initially have formed these negative ideas and beliefs about yourself from things you heard from a parent, teacher, family member or someone else who was in authority over you, or they may have been decisions that you made in reaction to some distressing event. Now, as an adult, you have incorporated them into your own personality. In effect you don't need those people in authority telling you what to do any more, they are living inside your own head!
surface when you are faced with doing something
that is counter to what your mind thinks you can
do, or has a negative opinion about. Think back
over some times when your own ideas or thoughts
about what you could or could not accomplish got
in the way of something you really wanted.
monologue is present in everyone. The bad news is
that there is no getting rid of it. The good news is
that you can learn how to manage your mind so that
it is your servant and you are the master, not the
other way around.
What is needed
first is awareness. You must become aware of the
inner dialogue. Your coach will ask you to begin to
notice when it shows up, what it is telling you. You
will have to be vigilant to begin with. You think
that voice is you. It isn't. The fact that you can
discuss it means that it is something that you do,
not who you are. Your coach will encourage you to
begin to pay attention to what you think. Observe it
without buying into what your mind is telling you.
See if you can start to recognize the repetitive
nature of the thoughts.
As your awareness
develops, you begin to realise that you don't have
to react to the thoughts your mind presents to you.
It is a habit you can break with that newly acquired
awareness. The moment you notice that it is just a
thought and not a command you have a choice. You are
in touch with your "observing self". That gap or
moment of awareness allows you to notice the thought
and either choose to do what you have always done,
or choose to do something different.
Start with observing how often you listen to “your mind”. Remember, change takes time, effort and persistent practice.
"You have everything you
need: a miraculous body, a phenomenal
brain, and a vast and powerful
subconscious mind. Now it's just a
matter of focusing them in the right
Stress is Unavoidable.
No one can live a
completely stress-free life. Nor would that be
desirable. "Good" stress or to put it another way,
"optimum" stress, is necessary for healthy growth
and development. On the other hand, ongoing,
relentless, frustrating, unresolved events and, even
more importantly, your responses to them, wreak
havoc on your physical and emotional well-being.
Since you do not have absolute control over your
universe, the only thing you can truly master is how
you respond to it.
physiological level, your reaction to stressful
events, whether you judge them to be positive or
negative, is basically the same. This is an aspect
of the “fight or flight” response - your body
preparing you for action. Your body gears up to be
able to do what is required to ensure your survival.
This "gearing up" is not a cause for alarm if it
occurs on a temporary and infrequent basis. But, if
your response keeps you in a hyper-aroused state for
very long, body systems start to show wear and tear
and can result in symptoms such as chronic
headaches, anxiety, insomnia, depression, irritable
bowel syndrome, Raynaud's Syndrome, hypertension,
panic attacks, adrenal fatigue, exhaustion and a
whole host of other chronic, resistant ailments.
psychological factors related to stress can also
take a toll on your emotional health. Consider, for
example, the stress of getting fired from your job.
Not only do you experience a physiological response
to such a highly stressful event, but you may
further incapacitate yourself with such self-talk as
"I am worthless", “I am a failure”, "I can't do
anything right", “I’ll never get such a good job
again”, or "What will my friends/family think of
me?" The good news is that you can learn ways of
managing your responses to challenging events to
minimize their negative impact.
Approaches to Successfully Managing Stress. a) Learn
how to recognize your body's stress response and
learn how to relax. b) Take stock of
your environment and your lifestyle and make
changes to counteract the ongoing stress.
b) Take stock of your environment and your lifestyle and make changes to counteract the ongoing stress.Which do you think is the hardest to do?
able to take your body to a state of deep relaxation
is the key to success. If done consistently, your
body can recuperate from chronic stress. Since you
are in control of your behaviour, this is usually
the easiest place to start.
problem with relaxation is that most people think
they already know what it is. Unfortunately,
stressed individuals have often lost the ability to
recognise what a really relaxed state feels like in
their body. When people under chronic stress think
of relaxation, they often think of recreation, or
the release created by exercise, alcohol, cigarettes
or recreational drugs, rather than true
with Awareness Training.
To effectively manage stress you must pay
attention to the signals your body is giving you
that tell you whether you are stressed or relaxed.
This may sound simple, but in many people, those
signals have been ignored for so long that they
either a) don't know what to look for and/or
b) would not even recognize the signs if they
attention to your body’s signals is a major step in
reducing stress. In our fast-paced society, people
often override symptoms of stress in order to be
Over time, this causes an increase in stress
levels, eventually leading to symptoms that can no
longer be ignored as the “fight or flight” response
Increased heart rate
Chest pains, tightness in
the chest, and/or a feeling of
suffocation/shortness of breath
Tight, tensed muscles
General numbness and/or
feeling of unreality and detachment
Tingling hands/”pins and
concentrating/shortened attention span
Difficulty in sleeping
To reduce the
damaging effects on the body of ongoing stressors,
the body needs to be allowed to relax and recharge
after getting geared up for a challenge.
Relaxation Techniques. One of the best relaxation exercises is the
practice of abdominal breathing. Yoga, meditation,
T'ai Chi and other meditative disciplines often use
abdominal respiration to promote relaxation. When
you practice relaxation consistently, over time the
body develops a baseline level of relaxation that
provides a 'buffer' against the negative effects of
stress. In other words, because you take your body
to a relaxed state often, the cumulative effects of
this relaxation training provide you with protection
from the daily effects of stress. Regular relaxation
training is useful as part of a programme of disease
prevention and maintenance of a happy, healthy
relaxation practice is different from the physical
exercise you do to stay in shape. It helps you stay
'in shape' in another way, through helping you
maintain optimum functioning. In order to obtain the
greatest benefits from relaxation, you must be
present and attuned to how your body feels. This is
quite different from going to the gym and reading a
book or listening to music while exercising on the
cross trainer, treadmill or stationary bicycle,
where your body is being worked, but your attention
is somewhere else.
you develop some skill in reducing the physical
symptoms of stress and still have a nervous system
that usually operates in the 'red zone', you will
need to investigate how your current coping
strategies and your activities contribute to the
level of tension or anxiety in your body. If you
feel pushed, exhausted, too busy, irritable and at
your wits end much of the time, then you are
probably in the 'red zone' too often. And if there
are ongoing, unresolved issues in your relationships
at home and at work that you feel you are just
'putting up with' but never seem to change, you are
also flirting with the 'red zone'.
way to look at this is to use the analogy of a car.
You can view the sympathetic (heightened) nervous
system activity as an accelerator pedal and the
parasympathetic (relaxation) nervous system activity
as a brake pedal. In order to remain healthy, you
have to apply the brake pedal regularly in order to
bring the 'rpms' of your body engine down to normal.
This is what regular breathing/relaxation practice
helps you to do. By regularly resetting the nervous
system back down to normal, you stay out of the red
Pain, No Gain.
Change is probably the hardest thing for
human beings to do. This is especially true with
conscious change, like a new exercise or diet
programme, or changing how you react to things. We
like familiarity; it gives us a feeling of comfort
and certainty. We have the same routines in the
morning, relate to our spouse or boss in the same
way. And we often stay the same even when faced with
the fact that our lives not working the way we would
like them to. While useful alternatives like reading
a book on relationships, taking a class or seeing a
counsellor are available, we say “no”, preferring
the familiar simply because change is uncomfortable.
Sustained effort is required in order to achieve
results, and this is where the support of a coach
can make all the difference.